Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
