i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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