I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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