You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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