I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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