Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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