as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
