just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Randomize
