my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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