I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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