I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Randomize
