don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
