what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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