There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize
