You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
No subtext here. People are naked.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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