spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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