if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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