How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
