He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
