I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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