I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
