if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize