I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Can vaginas get frostbite?
We don't watch enough power rangers
I can't turn off my feet"
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
