You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Randomize
