The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
