Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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