So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
