Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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