Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
