This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
