First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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