So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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