Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
