So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Randomize
