You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
