Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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