Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
