Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
it's like heaven, but drunker
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
