OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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