i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
tell me about the fingering
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