don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize