none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
We named our party play list daddy issues
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize
