Those balls look pretty dangerous.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
