I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Randomize
