You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
