I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
youre lurking in front of me
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
