he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
