I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize