shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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