By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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